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BREAK-UP: Our tips for getting over it and moving on

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No matter how long a relationship has lasted, a breakup is a painful moment, a difficult ordeal, from which it is hard to recover easily. Fortunately, several solutions exist and sometimes the answer is within reach. So if your relationship is over and you’re having trouble getting over it, the following will help you get through it.

Going out with girlfriends

If until now you spent all your evenings and weekends with Jules, it’s time to get back to the good old days. The ones with whom you have fun, laugh out loud, forget all your worries and have a good time. Don’t ask yourself too many questions, pick up the phone and contact the girlfriend or girlfriends who are or were often willing to go. If you’ve lost touch with your old girlfriends, it’s time to form a new, friendly group of 2 or 3 cool, crazy girls.  How do you go about it? Nothing could be easier. More and more people are posting on social networks in groups dedicated to friendship, networking where the profiles and average age match what they are looking for.

Sign up for a dating site

Yes, you read that right and no, it’s not for psychos! Almost everyone, at some point in their lives, needs this. If you’ve never done it before, it’s easy: You sign up on one of the most famous dating sites. Don’t choose any site, a site that nobody knows or an application in test phase. There are 2 or 3 applications known by all, to download on your smartphone. Some of them are free, others are free for some features, but you have to pay to communicate with potential suitors. Choose 1 or 2 beautiful photos of you, but especially photos that reflect your personality. For example, if you love hiking, choose a photo of yourself hiking and a photo of yourself in the evening, or on holiday. Then add all the information about your age, measurements, education, hobbies, and especially what you are looking for. Once you have entered this information, you can search for your ideal man by filters. You will probably not find him right away, even if everyone seems to be beautiful and perfect. With a little patience, a lot of vigilance, and a little bit of luck, you can meet your new crush.

Find a new passion

You may already have plenty of passions, or you may not have found a hobby yet. In either case, you can take up a new hobby. It is well known that art in all its forms, handicrafts, gardening, reading, sports and cooking are excellent therapies. The question is what kind of hobby to choose if you don’t already have an idea of what you would like to do. Here, you’ll have to dig deep inside yourself and ask yourself, what would you like to have in your hands right now to spend a pleasant afternoon or what would feed your mind. If you love to cook and bake, therapeutic cooking is a great way to relax and combine business with pleasure. If you’ve always loved being able to make crochet scarves or bags, it couldn’t be easier. The internet is full of videos where you can learn from scratch. Watch a few beginner videos, get inspired, write down the materials you need and get started on this new hobby. Otherwise, a very simple thing, learn to make up and make yourself look good. It’s also a simple, useful passion that will do you good. If these hobbies don’t speak to you, then you’d better seek to feed your soul or spirit spiritually with meditation, or by taking an interest in philosophy or religion.

Focus on your professional life

When faced with shock or disappointment, we all have different reactions and sometimes the results are extraordinary and rewarding. For example, some people, to escape a situation or, as in this case, to overcome a break-up, devote themselves to their professional life. It is a good way to, on the one hand, try to forget one’s past history, and on the other hand, to take advantage of one’s free time, to cultivate one’s knowledge, to advance on certain subjects that have remained on standby, to work more and earn more. But, because there has to be a but in this case, you have to know how to set limits and listen to your body. Because it is easy to overdo it and make your work toxic. As they say, moderation is the treasure of the wise. So working more is fine, but not to the point of exhaustion and to the detriment of your health.

Avoiding moments of loneliness

For some, solitude is beneficial, to find oneself, but this is not the case for everyone. If as soon as you isolate yourself, you start thinking about the past, and probably crying, solitude is not your best friend. In this case, it is better to surround yourself with loved ones, friends who bring you positive energy and recharge your batteries. The choice of people is obviously essential, so choose those who understand you, who support you, who do not judge you and who do not add a layer. If you don’t have these people in your circle, join clubs of your interests that you can find on the internet. Whether it’s people who like to party, read, hike, or whatever, surround yourself with the kind of people who bring you joy and good cheer. That being said, you never know what might come of it later.

Watching positive movies and series

It may seem trivial, but sometimes all it takes is one movie, one story, to change our lives forever. And thanks to video on demand, which has been proliferating on our televisions and computers in recent years, there is something for everyone. Moreover, it is possible to search by keyword, by theme, by type of program/movie/series, etc. To get over a breakup, we can dive into a movie or a series that take us and make us forget for a few hours a difficult situation or an uneasiness that is eating away at us. Sometimes it doesn’t take much, turn down the lights, get comfortable, find a good movie, and focus on the story.

Law of Attraction and Hoʻoponopono

Have you heard of the Law of Attraction? Yes ? No ? If you don’t know what it is yet, or you know what it is, but haven’t implemented it, it’s time to take action! This very simple law is very effective and allows you to focus on positive ideas and to see them materialize in the medium/long term. Some documentaries and films illustrate this very well, just do a search and you will have the Holy Grail at hand! According to this law and other similar laws and philosophies such as Hoʻoponopono, we attract and cause what we want to happen to us. Both of these practices allow us to eliminate negative ideas and attract what we want to experience. Moreover, thanks to these practices and other techniques, we can realize that sometimes the answer to what is happening to us is within us.

Consult a psychotherapist

If after hoping, trying, waiting, weeks and months go by without you feeling better, it would be wiser to consult a psychotherapist. Gone are the days when being followed by a professional is synonymous with failure or weakness. Nowadays, many people are being followed for different reasons, and having a professional by your side who knows how to analyze your sentimental or other path, is no longer a luxury. However, use a professional such as a psychotherapist or psychoanalyst, and avoid coaches without psychoanalytic training.

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